muse muse

hmmm...lots to muse on...been a while...

first...just finished Harry Potter #4. very intense towards the end...kinda scary for some kids. giving myself a rest before i start #5. i get too into these books. i'm becoming obsessed with the characters...i dream about them at night. i think i'm obsessed with sirius black the most. why? i dunno...maybe i just really liked the way gary oldman portrayed him in the movie...i really liked the look. every time i see him or think about him, i get emotionally stimulated. oh god, not in a passionate/love sort of way. then i'd be worried about myself. i just get adrenaline rushing through me kinda, i guess. it'll wear off, i know. these things always do (e.g., brad pitt in high school, ewan mcgregor as obi-wan in phantom menace...etc.) it's a sirius phase.

as said above, saw new harry potter movie. liked it as much as the book, though much different than book. much funnier than first two movies. cuaron a great director for the film...too bad he won't be back for goblet of fire. hey, what do you think? will voldemort be animated or have a live actor?

no teaching job yet. prospects look grim for this fall. probably will have to sub again. got hired by old navy again. this time i have more of a supervisor position, which is good. but not guaranteed 40 hours a week...may have to pick up some third hour shifts as a grocery store. don't know what else i can do...really want to teach! crappy decisions i've made. making me depressed again.

really strapped for money. really worried about it, too. life sucks sometimes. amazing how i get myself into these messes. things will work out, eventually. just won't be doing or buying much soon. gar.